My boss gave me two days off over the holidays, and I am taking 15 minutes from that time to ask the following questions and make the following wish:
- If what I got for Christmas was a spa certificate and when I went a very attractive masseuse gave me a nice rub down BUT wouldn’t allow me to, in return, also rub her down…did I receive a GIFT or an INJUSTICE?
- If what I got for Christmas was the smallest Christmas bonus I have ever gotten (because of the %$#@*& recession)…did I receive a GIFT or the 43rd REASON I do not like my boss?
- If what I got for Christmas was the IPad2 and I already have the IPad…did I receive a GIFT, an UPGRADE of a gift, or just a camera?
- If what I got for Christmas was an envelope with US$30 in it and I am over 40 years old, did I receive a traditional Jamaican GIFT or another REASON I won’t be visiting that cheap aunt next year?
- If what I received for Christmas was a miniature replica of a Ferrari and not the car itself…did I receive a GIFT or did someone stick their hand up my &^%$ and smile at me?
- If what I got for Christmas from my boss was a card with a photo of him with his family…did I receive a GIFT or the 44th REASON not to like him?
- If what I got for Christmas was a metal watch from someone I have, many times before, told that I do not like %$#&^*()$#%^ metal watches but rather leather…did I receive a GIFT or a REASON that could legitimise violence?
- If what I got for Christmas was yet another ^%$*& book…did I receive a GIFT or a REASON to tell someone what I really think about her?
- If what I got for Christmas was a Starbucks gift certificate… did I receive a GIFT or an ACT of laziness?
I would like to wish the three persons who gave me gifts I wanted a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year, and everyone else can #@%$*&^% off!
By the way, I have now finished reading Room. Rating – Very Good.